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Topic: My irrational Zooey Doucheanel rant  (Read 7069 times)

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« on: May 04, 2012, 10:28:33 AM »



Yes Zooey, it is f-ing raining.  What, you haven't seen rain before?  Holy f are you stupid.

Happy Friday everyone!
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« Reply #1 on: May 04, 2012, 10:37:53 AM »

What the hell is wrong with you.  Headscratch
How can you bitch about that great looking women???  Inlove  Inlove  Inlove
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« Reply #2 on: May 04, 2012, 10:39:15 AM »


Yes Zooey, it is f-ing raining.  What, you haven't seen rain before?  Holy f are you stupid.
+1
Ya, she's cute. but not THAT cute...  (or I'm not that desperate)
I tried to watch the show she's on.. but her and the show are to dumb to stomach.
I even saw her on some night show;  it's not her acting a dumb character...

Now Kat Dennings of 2 Broke Girls...  WHOLE other class
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« Reply #3 on: May 04, 2012, 10:47:55 AM »

Who?
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« Reply #4 on: May 04, 2012, 11:08:54 AM »

Wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers, would you?     Bigsmile
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« Reply #5 on: May 04, 2012, 11:10:41 AM »

Man card....revoked.
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« Reply #6 on: May 04, 2012, 11:25:19 AM »

 :leghump:
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« Reply #7 on: May 04, 2012, 11:26:26 AM »

She's cute but average looking.  Maybe a 6 from a scale of 1-10.
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« Reply #8 on: May 04, 2012, 11:40:18 AM »

If youre a fan there are some prety cool wallpapers out there.
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« Reply #9 on: May 04, 2012, 12:01:55 PM »

You're right - that was a pretty irrational rant.  She is pretty much the opposite of a douche. 

« Last Edit: May 04, 2012, 12:06:13 PM by Rincewind » Logged
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« Reply #10 on: May 04, 2012, 12:46:29 PM »


Wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers, would you?     Bigsmile


I said it was irrational.

Maybe I'd enjoy it more if the sound was muted...

Aww, icky cute wook at wat, wut iz dat weird wet stwuff, iz dat wain?!!!

Yes it is f-in rain!  What else could it be, King F-In Kong peeing on your f-in house?!!!

AAAAAAAArg, going HULK!!


I need help.
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« Reply #11 on: May 04, 2012, 12:47:12 PM »

Here I thought Guzzi riders were mellow people.  Lol
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« Reply #12 on: May 04, 2012, 12:53:56 PM »


You're right - that was a pretty irrational rant.  She is pretty much the opposite of a douche. 




Oh, much better.

Wearing a kid's cowboy hat and toy gun, then having a Jack Handy Deep Thoughts moment.
Thank you for that.

Did she say "Wut iz dis weird sandy stuff?  Siri, am I on a beach?"

Siri " Yes you f-in douche you are on a beach."


AAAAARRRRR!!!!
Posted on: May 04, 2012, 09:49:32 AM

Man card....revoked.


Man card?  MAN CARD?  My Vespa key is on a Hello Kitty key chain.

Man f-in card.  F.

AAAARRRR!
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« Reply #13 on: May 04, 2012, 12:56:37 PM »




I said it was irrational.

Maybe I'd enjoy it more if the sound was muted...

Aww, icky cute wook at wat, wut iz dat weird wet stwuff, iz dat wain?!!!

Yes it is f-in rain!  What else could it be, King F-In Kong peeing on your f-in house?!!!

AAAAAAAArg, going HULK!!


I need help.


Sorry, I don't think you can be helped. To far gone.
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« Reply #14 on: May 04, 2012, 01:17:22 PM »




Oh, much better.

Wearing a kid's cowboy hat and toy gun, then having a Jack Handy Deep Thoughts moment.
Thank you for that.

Did she say "Wut iz dis weird sandy stuff?  Siri, am I on a beach?"

Siri " Yes you f-in douche you are on a beach."


AAAAARRRRR!!!!
Posted on: May 04, 2012, 09:49:32 AM


Man card?  MAN CARD?  My Vespa key is on a Hello Kitty key chain.

Man f-in card.  F.

AAAARRRR!


Ohhh..c'mon..you should just sit there and drool and accept the syrupy sweet crap they feed you as real people. These peeps are deep I tell you!!!
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« Reply #15 on: May 04, 2012, 01:28:50 PM »




Sorry, I don't think you can be helped. To far gone.


Well he is a tad askew.
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« Reply #16 on: May 04, 2012, 02:18:15 PM »


She's cute but average looking.  Maybe a 6 from a scale of 1-10.


This ^^^^^
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« Reply #17 on: May 04, 2012, 03:02:15 PM »


Now Kat Dennings of 2 Broke Girls...  WHOLE other class


Kat Dennings  Inlove Drool Inlove  


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« Reply #18 on: May 04, 2012, 03:36:23 PM »




Kat Dennings  Inlove Drool Inlove  





Anger fading... Hulk feeling better..... Kat Dennings rrrroooowwwrrr!

Ya think Kat would use at her phone and ask it if that's wain?  No!  Hell no!  She uses the phone the way Graham Alexander Bell intended it to be used, and takes nekkid pictures of herself.  Which somehow get posted on the web.

"Siri, are those my tits?"
"Yes Kat, those sure are. And they are awesome.  And thank you for not being a douche like that dumbass Zooey chick"
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« Reply #19 on: May 04, 2012, 03:43:09 PM »

I'm guessing her sister Emily is more your type:

http://www.celebritiesheight.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Emily-Deschanel.jpg
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« Reply #20 on: May 04, 2012, 04:23:32 PM »

You guys can have the milk bags. I will take the skinny little nerd chick.

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« Reply #21 on: May 04, 2012, 04:57:27 PM »

Right now we really need a balanced dood like Shah to put this all into perspective...

Can someone get hold of him for a guest appearance?

 shahthread
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« Reply #22 on: May 04, 2012, 06:11:03 PM »


I could go for a Deschanel sandwich.
http://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b2/Wockman/Emily-and-Zooey-emily-deschanel-641.jpg
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« Reply #23 on: May 04, 2012, 06:40:51 PM »


I'm guessing her sister Emily is more your type:

http://www.celebritiesheight.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Emily-Deschanel.jpg


Yes, please.
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« Reply #24 on: May 04, 2012, 07:15:53 PM »



"Siri, are those my tits?"
"Yes Kat, those sure are. And they are awesome.  And thank you for not being a douche like that dumbass Zooey chick"

 Lol
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« Reply #25 on: May 05, 2012, 09:14:02 PM »

Zooey could keep me occupied for months... Inlove
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« Reply #26 on: May 05, 2012, 09:28:35 PM »

Zooey could keep me occupied for months... Inlove

+1  I think I love her.

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« Reply #27 on: May 05, 2012, 10:07:47 PM »

Zoey is adorable.
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« Reply #28 on: May 05, 2012, 10:24:18 PM »


Zoey is adorable.


The knights from Monty Python And the Holy Grail thought the bunny was adorable too.
At first.
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« Reply #29 on: May 05, 2012, 11:58:50 PM »

I think Zooey is quite the tasty bit of crumpet and I would like to do many unspeakable things to/with/at her. That said, while I enjoyed Hitchhiker's Guide, I don't watch her sitcom or listen to her music.




PS. The thread title would have been funnier if it was spelled 'Doucheanal'.
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« Reply #30 on: May 06, 2012, 12:03:30 AM »




Anger fading... Hulk feeling better..... Kat Dennings rrrroooowwwrrr!

Ya think Kat would use at her phone and ask it if that's wain?  No!  Hell no!  She uses the phone the way Graham Alexander Bell intended it to be used, and takes nekkid pictures of herself.  Which somehow get posted on the web.

"Siri, are those my tits?"
"Yes Kat, those sure are. And they are awesome.  And thank you for not being a douche like that dumbass Zooey chick"





Thank you, sir, for sending me off to google (successfully and happily, I might add).





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« Reply #31 on: May 06, 2012, 10:44:16 AM »

Neither one of those ladies does a thing for me.  I would kick them both out for even thinking about eating crackers in bed.

I would, however, allow them to change the sheets and bring me a sandwich after I was done with Megyn Price.......mmmmm tasty.  Need to be alone now.


Crap I can't remember how to post pictures.
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« Reply #32 on: May 06, 2012, 01:04:14 PM »


Neither one of those ladies does a thing for me.  I would kick them both out for even thinking about eating crackers in bed.

I would, however, allow them to change the sheets and bring me a sandwich after I was done with Megyn Price.......mmmmm tasty.  Need to be alone now.


I just googled her. Enjoy. I'll take Zoey and Kat to block.

Hey, at my age, I like two women at once. That way, when I fall asleep,  they have each other to talk to and can leave me alone.
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« Reply #33 on: May 07, 2012, 01:14:13 PM »







Thank you, sir, for sending me off to google (successfully and happily, I might add).





Siri was right on those two...
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« Reply #34 on: May 07, 2012, 01:23:22 PM »




I just googled her. Enjoy. I'll take Zoey and Kat to block.

Hey, at my age, I like two women at once. That way, when I fall asleep,  they have each other to talk to and can leave me alone.


 Lol
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« Reply #35 on: May 07, 2012, 07:09:44 PM »

...I like two women at once. That way, when I fall asleep,  they have each other to talk to and can leave me alone.

You Sir, are a true ladies man, and should be doing stand-up.
 Bigok
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« Reply #36 on: May 07, 2012, 09:41:44 PM »



You Sir, are a true ladies man, and should be doing stand-up.
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« Reply #37 on: May 07, 2012, 09:52:34 PM »

I would fill Zooey Deschanel full of my intelligence. Many many times. And butter....

Go watch her in "Tinman". Omfg!

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« Reply #38 on: May 08, 2012, 01:51:25 PM »


Neither one of those ladies does a thing for me.  I would kick them both out for even thinking about eating crackers in bed.

I would, however, allow them to change the sheets and bring me a sandwich after I was done with Megyn Price.......mmmmm tasty.  Need to be alone now.


Crap I can't remember how to post pictures.


Sorry, man on man pictures are not allowed!!!  Crazy
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« Reply #39 on: May 09, 2012, 12:07:20 AM »

I was talking with a friend about Zooey and he sent me this.
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« Reply #40 on: May 09, 2012, 10:39:15 AM »






Now those two together, there's a sandwich. Katy and Zooey are both smoking hot.  Inlove  Thumbsup
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« Reply #41 on: May 09, 2012, 10:44:04 AM »



I could go for a Deschanel sandwich.




Zooey is cute. Emily looks like a dude.
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« Reply #42 on: May 09, 2012, 02:01:42 PM »






Zooey is cute. Emily looks like a dude.


Emily's jaw is very square, which is a typical male trait.  Overall, I think the Deschanel sisters are both cute, but in different ways.

Having said that, Zooey should have NEVER sung that commercial for cotton:

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« Reply #43 on: May 09, 2012, 03:12:43 PM »


Having said that, Zooey should have NEVER sung that commercial for cotton:




Quote
Zooey is walking this bike because she does not know how to ride it


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« Reply #44 on: May 09, 2012, 05:26:43 PM »


Ya, she's cute. but not THAT cute...  (or I'm not that desperate)


Yes,  she IS... THAT... CUTE.

Brutally sexy,  infectiously alluring?  hmmm, no.

But, Cute?   Oh yea....  I'm sure Susan Sarandon is about to barge talking about baby ducks.
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« Reply #45 on: May 09, 2012, 06:59:59 PM »

Like children....she should be seen not heard.
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« Reply #46 on: May 09, 2012, 10:40:45 PM »


Like children....she should be seen not heard.


I don't know, she might make some pretty cool noises with the right encouragement.
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« Reply #47 on: May 10, 2012, 10:44:19 PM »


Like children....she should be seen not heard.


She has an OK set of pipes.  I'm just not into her "cutesy" music.

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« Reply #48 on: May 21, 2012, 07:27:36 PM »

Now back to Kat
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« Reply #49 on: June 11, 2012, 07:11:19 PM »

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« Reply #50 on: June 12, 2012, 11:35:03 AM »


She's cute but average looking.  Maybe a 6 from a scale of 1-10.


Since I'm about that myself, plus much older, I can agree with that. Lol
Funny though, she doesn't look much different than when she was in one of my favorite movies, "Almost Famous". Headscratch
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« Reply #51 on: June 12, 2012, 11:59:21 AM »


I was talking with a friend about Zooey and he sent me this.




Katy Perry is so unbelievably hot.

And then my mom had to go and ruin it for me by stating, since she has dark hair with bangs and big blue eyes, that my 5 year old little girl looks like her. Now I can't look at Katy Perry without thinking about my daughter.

Thanks Mom.  
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« Reply #52 on: June 12, 2012, 12:47:42 PM »

She has big hands and kind of big feet....which is much like the 6ft tall draq queen that gave me that lower back rub this year at gay pride where I was the DD for my gay friends such that I could have an excuse to find the Bi lesbians and fag hags.

I would hit that.

The great sahllow Shah has spoken.

Now post pictures of Ms. Perry lookin all sexy!
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« Reply #53 on: June 12, 2012, 04:56:36 PM »


She has big hands and kind of big feet....which is much like the 6ft tall draq queen that gave me that lower back rub this year at gay pride where I was the DD for my gay friends such that I could have an excuse to find the Bi lesbians and fag hags.

I would hit that.

The great sahllow Shah has spoken.

Now post pictures of Ms. Perry lookin all sexy!


No - that can't be the one and only Shah, can it?
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« Reply #54 on: June 12, 2012, 05:13:43 PM »




No - that can't be the one and only Shah, can it?


it is indeed.
You can view his triumphant return here:

http://www.sport-touring.net/forums/index.php/topic,72151.0.html
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« Reply #55 on: June 12, 2012, 07:11:44 PM »

shahthread
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« Reply #56 on: June 12, 2012, 09:54:29 PM »

The way I see it...

Official spokeswoman for cotton.  







Official spokeswoman for leather, chains, and whips.   Inlove

 
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« Reply #57 on: June 12, 2012, 11:16:23 PM »

I like this guy.  Bigsmile
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« Reply #58 on: June 13, 2012, 06:59:12 AM »


The way I see it...

Official spokeswoman for cotton.  






This woman was born to do comedy. I have no idea which one it is. I'm so confused. Wink Bigsmile
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« Reply #59 on: June 14, 2012, 12:59:30 PM »

Am I the only one who had to use Google to find out who these women/girls are?  I know one of them is a singer or something.
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« Reply #60 on: June 14, 2012, 01:04:53 PM »


Am I the only one who had to use Google to find out who these women/girls are?


No.  The older I get the less television I watch. The downside of that is that it is somewhat socially isolating and I can no longer talk about popular culture.
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« Reply #61 on: June 14, 2012, 01:10:02 PM »

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« Reply #62 on: June 14, 2012, 01:16:30 PM »




Oh, much better.

Wearing a kid's cowboy hat and toy gun, then having a Jack Handy Deep Thoughts moment.
Thank you for that.

Did she say "Wut iz dis weird sandy stuff?  Siri, am I on a beach?"

Siri " Yes you f-in douche you are on a beach."


AAAAARRRRR!!!!
Posted on: May 04, 2012, 09:49:32 AM


Man card?  MAN CARD?  My Vespa key is on a Hello Kitty key chain.

Man f-in card.  F.

AAAARRRR!


I lollered  Lol Lol Lol. I got's me a new sig line.  Bigsmile
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« Reply #63 on: June 14, 2012, 03:53:20 PM »


Neither one of those ladies does a thing for me.  I would kick them both out for even thinking about eating crackers in bed.

I would, however, allow them to change the sheets and bring me a sandwich after I was done with Megyn Price.......mmmmm tasty.  Need to be alone now.


Crap I can't remember how to post pictures.


This...except, I would insert another name for Megyn Price, but totally agree on the rest.  Neither of them is hawt...at all.
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« Reply #64 on: June 14, 2012, 05:19:06 PM »




This...except, I would insert another name for Megyn Price, but totally agree on the rest.  Neither of them is hawt...at all.


Yeah this over Kat, Katy or Zooey? I don't think so. But hey, there is someone for everyone or so I was once told.  Lol

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« Reply #65 on: June 14, 2012, 06:15:18 PM »

Yeah, I don't know why anyone would think Katy Perry is hot.

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« Reply #66 on: June 14, 2012, 06:31:16 PM »


Yeah, I don't know why anyone would think Katy Perry is hot.



In the music industry right now shes about as hot as it gets. Just my opinion though.  Bigsmile
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« Reply #67 on: July 12, 2012, 09:00:43 PM »


Yeah, I don't know why anyone would think Katy Perry is hot.




I hate it when my pockets stick out of my shorts...no wonder she looks pissed.
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« Reply #68 on: July 13, 2012, 10:43:24 AM »


Official spokeswoman for leather, chains, and whips.   Inlove

 



Howcome women always do that poochy lip thing? makes them look like a fish     Rolleyes
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« Reply #69 on: July 13, 2012, 11:11:35 AM »

It's just that one pic. look at some more pix of Kat. Never mind i got that for you Smile she has thick lips.  





 just one more



 Inlove Inlove
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« Reply #70 on: July 13, 2012, 11:13:51 AM »





Howcome women always do that poochy lip thing? makes them look like a fish     Rolleyes


It's a duck. Duckface.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Duckface
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« Reply #71 on: July 13, 2012, 11:20:07 AM »

aka trout pout
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« Reply #72 on: July 13, 2012, 11:41:44 AM »

Ahhh well that explains it then, a Duckface...

Looks pretty stupid, like those fake-o botox lips.. just go with what the Good Lord gave you ladies, you look better that way.

 Bigok
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« Reply #73 on: July 13, 2012, 12:33:43 PM »



 Lol

"Stupid facial expression put forth by stupid women that don't know how to smile. "
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« Reply #74 on: July 13, 2012, 12:41:32 PM »

Thank god my daughter doesn't do that.  Cool

She's the pretty one not making the stupid face.

Hell of a good kid, I'm very proud of her. She'll be 20 this winter and has NEVER been in trouble
or done anything destructively stupid.  Thumbsup Thumbsup




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« Reply #75 on: July 13, 2012, 12:50:00 PM »

How come women always do that poochy lip thing? makes them look like a fish     Rolleyes
'Cause the (gay) photographer tells em to.
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« Reply #76 on: July 13, 2012, 12:57:35 PM »

Is Zooey pronounced the same as Zoe?

I watched Grindhouse again last night and have really developed a thing for Zoe Bell.  The adrenaline junky thing might have something to do with it.  



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« Reply #77 on: July 13, 2012, 01:10:32 PM »


Thank god my daughter doesn't do that.  Cool

She's the pretty one not making the stupid face.

Hell of a good kid, I'm very proud of her. She'll be 20 this winter and has NEVER been in trouble
or done anything destructively stupid.  Thumbsup Thumbsup







I was gonna say something completely inappropriate and then I remembered I have a daughter. CONFARNIT!    So I'll just say  Beerchug
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I see what you did there.




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« Reply #78 on: July 13, 2012, 01:13:35 PM »


Thank god my daughter doesn't do that.  Cool

She's the pretty one not making the stupid face.

Hell of a good kid, I'm very proud of her. She'll be 20 this winter and has NEVER been in trouble
or done anything destructively stupid that I ever found out about.  Thumbsup Thumbsup







Edited for accuracy, my parents think I was a good kid, too.  Wink
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« Reply #79 on: July 13, 2012, 01:15:30 PM »




Edited for accuracy, my parents think I was a good kid, too.  Wink


Oh I know. But at least she's smart enough not to get caught... Thumbsup
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I see what you did there.




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« Reply #80 on: July 13, 2012, 01:20:41 PM »




Oh I know. But at least she's smart enough not to get caught... Thumbsup


 Lol
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